Love is in the air at Tech as Feb. 14 rolls around. While this can be a fun and romantic time for some, it can also be stressful, bordering on depressing time, for those who have yet to find their one true love. Fear not because, with these tips, you will surely not be alone this Valentine’s Day.
Meet people! You can’t meet the love of your life if you don’t talk to people. There’s a difference between daydreaming of a relationship and actively trying to find someone to be with.
College students, especially the upperclassmen, tend to feel stuck because they have their set friend groups and hangout spots and do not tread beyond that.
If you identify with this group, join clubs, intramurals, a fraternity/sorority or do anything else where you are regularly exposing yourself to a new group of interesting and exciting people.
As small as your bubble may seem, Tech is a big school, and there are always droves of new people waiting to meet you. Joining an organization within your comfort zone can connect you with others of a similar background or interests, whereas getting involved with a less familiar organization can expose you to entirely new people and experiences; it all boils down to what you prefer. Even if you don’t meet that special someone, learning a new skill or revisiting an old hobby is always a fulfilling experience.
PLAY IT COOL
Not every person you meet necessarily has to be a love interest — or at least start that way. Moreover, not every person you meet necessarily has to be someone you “go for.” Beyond being just a little creepy, throwing yourself at everyone and anyone is not a way to find the love of your life.
While media such as movies and songs can place a strong emphasis on romantic experiences and relationships — and these representations can be helpful — keep in mind that the purpose of media is to entertain.
Even on holidays like Valentine’s Day, forms of platonic and familial love are alive, well and worth your time and attention.
Additionally, placing too heavy an emphasis on romance or trying to force something that is not meant to be can have the opposite effect to your goals of romance.
While this is almost universal knowledge, it is still paramount to reiterate there is nothing less attractive than someone desperate.
Another added benefit of being nice to the people you meet is that you can expand your inner and outer circle, thus granting you greater opportunities to broaden your social network and continue to regularly meet new people.
SHOOT YOUR SHOT
Don’t be afraid to tell someone how you feel about them. “The worst thing they can say is no,” is beyond cliche but also true. If you feel actual chemistry with someone, there’s a chance they probably recognize it too. While it may feel intimidating, bottling up your feelings is undoubtedly worse. Sometimes the best approach is just to weigh out your options and rip off the band aid.
While this may be an overgeneralization, rejection can hurt, but tends to happen when there is an unrequited or one-sided relationship between two people.
When the attraction and connection are genuine, something tends to form if the other person shows their mutual feelings by feeding into and putting energy into the relationship. If this isn’t the case, ask yourself if the relationship can fulfill what requirements you are looking for.
Another useful tip is to be someone you would want to date. Trying a new hairstyle you’ve wanted, smelling nice or having a good outfit can help people form a positive opinion of you, which is always beneficial when looking for love at the Institute (or elsewhere).
However, the biggest reason for putting effort into your presentation is your confidence. When you know you have a great outfit or scent because of a new cologne or perfume, you carry yourself differently, and people notice that. One caveat is that no matter how attractive you make yourself out to be, personality will always make or break any relationship.
That is why the last and most important tip is just to be kind. Be a genuine, helping person to every Jacket you meet, no matter the context. The least talked about part of dating is ironically the most important: character.
Regardless of who you meet, you will have an impression of how kind they are, and it will undeniably impact your relationship with them, however the dynamic unfolds. Inversely, it makes sense that the same thing would happen with you as well.
To recap, meet as many people as possible, yet be selective with whom you approach. However, when you find the one, don’t be afraid to shoot your shot.
Also, don’t forget that in the same way you are picky with who you date, your future partner probably is too, so don’t forget to look and feel good and be kind and passionate. With that being said, good luck Jackets!