I still remember the night I got my Georgia Tech acceptance email in 2020. I had just finished high school and was back home. It was late at night, and I was probably watching Breaking Bad when the notification popped up in my inbox. In that moment, I was on top of the world. I was relieved because if I had not gotten into Tech, I would have had to stay in India for college — something that I did not want.
If someone had told me then that by the time I graduated, I would want to move back to India, I would have scoffed. I had always wanted to work in a city like New York, earn in USD and chase the American Dream. But maybe that’s the funny thing about life — you might think you have figured it out, and then it throws a curveball at you. As I approach graduation at the end of this month, I have booked a one-way ticket home. And I have never felt so confident and excited about a decision.
“The grass is always greener on the other side” is an idiom that aptly represents my time in the U.S. I wish my high school seniors, who immigrated to different countries for higher education, had shared how difficult it is to move to an entirely new country at 18. I only heard the good parts: the parties, the opportunities and the hype.
But the first reason I am heading back is the feeling of never quite belonging. Despite my best efforts, I struggled to feel at home for four years. I tried to blend in. I joined a fraternity, learned the rules of football, hung lanyards from my pockets, wore baseball caps, and even tried to develop my accent. Nevertheless, I still felt out of place. There was no cathartic moment, just a slow realization that I didn’t have to hide who I was. It felt like a burden had been lifted off my shoulders, the burden of not letting my Indianness spill out.
Over time, I began embracing my identity. I started playing cricket again. I enjoyed wearing traditional Indian clothes on campus. I celebrated Indian festivals with joy instead of hesitation. And as I got comfortable in my own skin, I felt more confident. Why should I pretend to be someone I’m not just to fit in? India doesn’t lack the people who will accept me as I am. There’s room for me to grow there without giving up who I am.
The biggest reason, though, is that I miss my family. I’ve been away from home since 2014. The first six years were spent in a boarding school, followed by four years in the U.S. In my rebellious teenage phase, I used to think I didn’t need my family to thrive. Tech broke my hubris. Being sick with no one around and watching my American peers go home for the weekend while I waited a year to see my parents made me realize what I was missing.
There’s also the uglier side of being an immigrant. In my sophomore year, an American friend ridiculed me for my accent and told me to take English lessons. I am not sure if he meant it as a joke or wanted to hurt me, but I was taken aback. Since then, I have avoided most interactions with non-Indians — not out of hate but fear. I became more guarded, always watching what I said and always worried about being misunderstood or mocked.
That said, if I could go back in time, I would still move to the U.S. for college. Tech has shaped me into the person I am today, and for that, I’m grateful.
I’m taking back lessons that will stay with me forever. I no longer hold the class or caste biases I once had growing up in India. I’ve worked minimum-wage jobs as an usher and in corporate internships. I have come to respect all forms of labor equally and will take that mindset back with me.
I will also carry the civic courtesies I have picked up here: holding the door for others, thanking service workers and waving to acknowledge drivers who let me merge. I am also grateful to the U.S. for introducing me to the best beverage in the world: Diet Coke.
I have developed a renewed appreciation for my country after living here. My favorite cuisine is Indian. My dream concert is an Indian duo. I am funnier in my Indian mother tongue. So, why stay in a place where I constantly feel the need to hold a facade when I can live authentically at home?
Sometimes, the farther you travel, the more clearly you see where you truly belong. America taught me resilience, made me confident and, most importantly, led me to my Indian Dream.